Sapphic, sometimes known as women loving women , or sapphist, refers to a woman or woman-aligned person of any sexual orientation who is attracted to other women and/or women-aligned individuals. Another definition is specifically inclusive of non-binary people. It is an umbrella term for many identities, including those who are lesbian, pansexual, bisexual, or queer. It is used to promote solidarity among women and non-binary people of all identities who are attracted to those who are women and woman-aligned. It may also be used as an identity, and may be found particularly useful for individuals who know they are attracted to women but may be uncertain if they are attracted to other genders.

What It Means to Be: Pansexual

Sian Ferguson is a freelance writer and editor based in Cape Town, South Africa. Her writing covers issues relating to social justice, cannabis, and health. These are only a few examples of what mixed orientation can look like. As the field of sex work expands, more therapists are encountering sex workers seeking therapy. Research into sex with exes found that people tend to have it within two weeks of a split, when sadness over the breakup reaches its peak.

Remember that someone in a seemingly “heterosexual” relationship might actually be polysexual, queer, bisexual, pansexual, or something else. So, while pansexual people technically fall under the umbrella of polysexual — because they are indeed attracted to people of multiple genders — not all polysexual people are pansexual. Additionally, many people assume that bisexual people in a different-sex relationship are straight, and that bisexual people in a same-sex relationship are gay or lesbian. These assumptions remove the identities of bisexual individuals, a process known as bisexual erasure . Being attracted to people of all genders, not only men, women, or nonbinary people, is the most telling sign that you are pansexual. It doesn’t mean you’re attracted to everyone, but it does mean you’re capable of finding sexually appealing people of any gender.

If a nonbinary doesn’t feel comfortable having their relationship labeled as “straight”/“gay,” they can define it another way themselves. Pansexual could refer to someone who is sexually and/or romantically attracted to a person regardless of that person’s biological sex — It’s not their biological equipment that is most critical. Sociologist Emily Lenning expanded this definition by centrally including gender. However, they also create an implication that straight and gay people can’t include any nonbinary people as this would allegedly mean these sexualities include “more than one” gender. That brings us to your question about identifying as pansexual instead of bisexual. Then there are people insisting pansexuality is the only identity that leaves room for attraction to non-binary individuals, ignoring the fact that plenty of bi folks date non-binary folks.

I came out as pansexual in a straight-passing relationship

Sawayama came out as pansexual and bisexual to Broadly in 2018, saying, “I’ve always written songs about girls. I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned a guy in my songs, and that’s why I wanted to talk about it.” While they were a guest on The Joe Rogan Experience podcast in March, Demi was asked by Rogan if they identify as pansexual. Lovato responded by saying, “Yeah, pansexual,” and added that they are “part of the alphabet mafia and proud,” in reference to the LGBTQIA+ community. Singer and actor Janelle Monáe initially identified as bisexual before learning of pansexuality.

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If you come out, you may be outing your partner as well. This disclosure can have serious effects on your partner’s life. Some people assume that attraction to others regardless of gender implies that pansexual people act on their attraction more frequently than others. This can lead to the stereotype that pansexual people are promiscuous.

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If you’re female and you’re attracted to someone who identifies as male, you aren’t a lesbian, you aren’t even bisexual. Some LGBTQ+ people however reject the word queer as either an umbrella term for the community or a personal identifier. For some people, this is because the term queer has a history of use as a slur against the LGBTQ+ community. For others, this may be because another label holds more power for them personally. This rising star has spoken openly about her bisexuality and has challenged society’s biphobia and bi-erasure.

“I never have myself defined by the person I’m with,” Heard said this year at a panel for the The Economist in New York City. “I never saw myself defined as one particular thing or not.” Jealousy is a natural response and a lot of poly groups deal with it, some better than others. It’s best to acknowledge and validate it, and figure out what’s at the root of it so that you can all work through it together and keep the relationships involved healthy. Don’t let anyone gaslight you about how you don’t need to be upset or that jealousy is an unnatural emotion and that you’re wrong for feeling it. He is my partner, my confidante, my lover, my friend. I would often tell him, if he woke up the next day a woman, I would still want to be with her.

Ask politely – Your sense of humor is never appreciated when it is used to make fun of another person’s sexual orientation or the way they were born. More and more people are becoming familiar with the term “pansexual.” Simply put, someone who is pansexual can be attracted to people of any gender. Someone who is panromantic has the potential to be romantically attracted to people of all gender identities. Both, for example, include attraction to two or more genders. (Because pansexual folks are attracted to all genders, they fall into the “or more” category). Some pansexual people say their orientation has nothing to do with gender.

It’s safe to say nonbinary individuals have existed for centuries, at least. If you’d like to learn more about misconceptions about nonbinary identities and sexuality in relation to gender, click here, here, and here for videos from Ritchie. Nonbinary identities are too complex — some of them contradictory — to define sexuality around them in the first place; people of any sexuality can be attracted to nonbinary individuals. Virtually everyone has found somebody attractive without 100% knowing what their gender is.

These relationships may be “straight-passing,” or they may be obviously non-heterosexual. Regardless of their partner’s gender, a pansexual person remains pansexual – they often do not experience “straight-passing” privilege. Instead, they may experience microaggressions as their sexuality is ignored or dismissed. High school can be an exciting but a stressful time. As you are getting to know about yourself, you may have realized that you identify as gay, pansexual, or bisexual.

She has since become outspoken about bisexuality on the platform. Queer women everywhere rejoiced when the quirky Parks and Recreation star told The Advocate she will “fall in love with girls and guys” and she has “a major crush” on fellow Addicted to Fresno actor Natasha Lyonne. This is a place for all pansexuals to go and talk freely. For context, Im poly—you always talk with your current partner and see how they’re feeling and if they’re okay with you developing another relationship. There are countless examples of how mixed orientation can appear among homoromantic people. Remember that the label you choose to describe your experiences — if any — are up to you.

There’s an interesting inquiry concerning whether certain other nonbinary people can conform to or defy their gender roles. Since many nonbinary identities don’t have gender roles at all , one could argue that conforming/nonconforming terminology simply doesn’t apply. While a number of people expect androgyny from nonbinary people, virtually no defined societal frameworks exist for individual nonbinary identities the way gender expectations exist for men and women.